A Four generational look at motherhood

Week three: My Treasure, My Heart

Proverbs 24:3–“By wisdom a house is built, and by understanding it is established.”

Three words, three words spoken that change your life forever, ready or not…”You Are Pregnant!”
Whether those words come to you long anticipated, or whether those words come to you as a surprise, they truly change your life forever!

I will never forget when I looked at the markings on that magical stick and it had a + sign. Then I went to my first doctor appointment and I heard those words spoken to me, “You are pregnant!” We were ready, we had prayed, and God was giving us a blessing, ready or not! Was I ready? is anybody ever really ready? I grew up playing with dolls and Barbies, dreaming of the day I would be a mom. I had fantasized about it and how I would hold that sweet bundle in my arms, rock her/him to sleep, say prayers at night over them, and cuddle them every chance I could. I was blessed to have been given two great examples of being a good mom, but still the question remained: was I ready?

Well, ready or not, it was happening! Jim and I had been married three years, and had decided together that we were ready to start trying to have a family. Little did I know it would happen so quickly! From all the stories I had heard it would take a while…First time was a charm for us, we were going to be parents, ready or not! I loved my time with Jim, starting a life together, our adventures together, just the two of us, setting up a home together, and beginning our ministry life together. Was I ready to add another? I have a feeling this is how most of us feel, when the daunting reality is finally placed before us, that we are going to be raising another life.

I want to be very sensitive here and acknowledge the fact that many try for years and struggle to hear those words “you are pregnant.” Others struggle for years and never get to hear the words, “you are pregnant.” While others hear the words “you are pregnant,” yet you never intended for that to be the outcome. While yet others of us, you hear the words “you are pregnant,” and are not blessed to carry that pregnancy to full-term. That happened to me at the end of four months with my second pregnancy. It was a painful part of my reality, but God has used it to build His character in me even further. But that is a blog post for another time.

Motherhood: in its truest form is loving, nurturing, and caring for another. We are all called to that in some way, shape, or form. You may be an aunt, you may be a stand-in-mom or grandma to someone in your neighborhood or at your church. All around us, there are children that need to feel the love of Jesus. And we can all fulfill this calling to some point. This calling brings us back to the reality of ready or not, you are responsible for another being.

Was I am ready for this task? No! Was I excited at the possibilities that lay ahead? Yes! But I think if any of us are honest, we are all scared at the possibility of being responsible for someone other than ourselves. It’s scary enough to be responsible for yourself!

There is no greater time in my life that I was drawn to my knees in prayer, to God’s word, to open its pages for wisdom and counsel, knowing that on my own I could not do this, but learning to trust and depend on my God who I knew could do it through me!

My husband and I grew together as a couple, as we learned to look to the other for their strengths and depend on them to complement our weaknesses. It forced us to learn to communicate better and more effectively, so that we could be on the same page as far as discipline, expectations, and values. It drove us to create what we call our family values: SWANEY FAMILY VALUES!

Our overriding verse was Matthew 6:33. We were going to be a family that “Matthew 6:33ed it, “To seek first his kingdom, and his righteousness, and all of these things will be added to you.”

Some simple rules we followed:

“Let your yes be yes and your no be no.” Matthew 5:37.

“You get what you get and you don’t throw a fit,” so be content in all things. Philippians 4:12

“Do everything without arguing or complaining.” Philippians 2:14

Along with our family rules or values, there were overriding truths we believed. According to Scripture, our children are gifts from God, a welcome member to our already existing family. Through marriage God creates a family.  A family begins with the husband and wife, and that is the primary, foundational relationship in any family.  If we are blessed with children, they are welcome family members and beautiful gifts from God. This helped remind this mama that even at the times when I would tend to make them the center of my universe, my relationship with Jim was central, and our kids were welcome members to our already existing family. Yes, there were times when they needed to come first, and things needed to be set aside for their benefit. But it was also equally true that there were times they needed to learn to wait, they needed to learn to give, so that someone else in the family would be first.

Another Family Value we practiced was going to church. Church was a given, not an option. We love God out of His great love for us, and we give back because of what He has done for us, not out of obligation but out of love and our desire to please Him. This meant that we did not use church as a punishment, or a privilege that they could lose. It was simply a lifestyle.

One of our most important family values was instilling the belief that God had created each of them–each one of us–with special, unique, gifts, talents and abilities. We offered many opportunities to discover those abilities to our children. Yes, this may have created a “busy schedule”, at times, but we believed this was an important training ground for our children. Sometimes we need to know what we are not good at something in order to understand what we are good at!  It was a valuable lesson to teach our children that they were not good at everything, and so they would need to work hard at the things they were not good at. It also helped them learn compassion for those who are not gifted in the same way. One of my favorite stories to tell about my daughter–but also one of the hardest stories to live through with my daughter–was giving her piano lessons. So many things came easy to her.  Playing the piano, however, did not! She started with great enthusiasm, and quickly she wanted to quit. But her dad and I told her she needed to continue. She finished out the first year and it was painful for all of us! But she continued on the second year, and the next year after that. After three years of struggling to learn to play the piano, she could learn by perseverance to do something she was not naturally gifted at, but it took a lot of hard work. At the end of that third year we felt she had indeed learned the lesson, and we were all excited when that came to an end!

For my son it was the painful lesson of “hurry.”  When he was in 5th grade, I saw him hurrying through something he was naturally good at, his school studies, but I had to stand back and let him take a lesser grade for not following all of the specific roles in the syllabus, and knew that, in getting that lower grade, he would learn how to slow down, to read over everything carefully, and to do better the next time. To this day I think it was the only C+ he ever received! And since it was only in fifth grade, it didn’t hurt any of his future transcripts! Allowing my children to try, to work hard, and too at times fail, was painful for me as a mom. But in loving them more than life itself, I knew it was the right thing to do for them.

Sports came naturally to our children, but the lessons they learned were invaluable: be a good sport, don’t go bragging and boasting, and be empathetic to all, no matter their skill level or ability.

Colossians 3:13: ” Bear with one another.” 

We worked hard to instill the belief that our children were each other’s greatest cheerleaders. We were to be the encouragers for each other first. God gave Tyler one sister, and God gave Christina one brother, God had made us a family, and we were to be each other’s greatest source of strength and encouragement! It was not an option to attend each other’s games or not: it was a family value and expectation. Not comparing oneself to the other, but celebrating each other in all of their achievements. We avoided the comparison trap!

One of the greatest family values that I haven’t mentioned yet, was being confident in the fact that God had called us into ministry as a family. Knowing and believing that God would not have called dad into full-time ministry, if he had not called mom and his children into full-time ministry as well. Once again living out the belief that we were a family, and the children were welcome members into that Christian, dad-as-a-pastor family. We taught our children what we believed: that we were blessed by God to be a blessing to others.  That everything we have comes from God, “every good and perfect gift comes from above.” And we were thrilled to be able to take them on the mission field at a very young age, and on many mission trips that followed when they were teenagers, to show them firsthand that the rest of the world needs God, and does not live like we do. This mother’s heart was full of joy and pride as she witnessed her children dig in with full hearts and willing hands!

Parenting can be exhausting! And being a good parent is even more so!

It wasn’t just enough to have our family values, and it wasn’t just enough to tell our children what to do. The hardest part of parenting is living it out by example. Taking the time to explain each value and expectation to your child not just once, but over and over and over again. It also meant giving them the “Why.” Why God is calling us to this behavior; why this is best for our family; why this is best for others around them.

Jim and I determined our goal and God-given role in parenting: “To raise a godly heritage,” one that would grow to know Him, to understand His love for them, choose Him for their own, and serve Him in whatever way, to further God’s kingdom. While this was a large goal, it kept our focus centered. When an issue with discipline arose, we acted on it from this focus. When a choice that may have seemed questionable arose, we acted on it from this focus.

The greatest lesson I learned by being a mom was humility! The reality and truth that I did not have all of the answers and that I was not always right! I was the mom and did have God given authority to train up my children in the way He desired for me to train them up to the very best of my ability. But the only way that I could do that was to seek him earnestly through prayer and to learn with His eyes and gain insight as to who my children really were. My daily prayer was for God to give me His eyes to help me be the mom that he called me to be for Christina and for Tyler. For God to help me to be the wife that Jim needed me to be, and for God to please make me a servant, a woman who would love God first, her husband next, her children after that, and then the world that He put before me.

My first child was a beautiful daughter! Her eyes were so crystal blue that after naming her Christina, my mom told me I should have named her Crystal. I learned quickly that she had the character far more like her father’s than mine! She was determined, far more intelligent than me, and very strong-willed! I used to say that James Dobson’s Book, the strong-willed Child, had nothing on my Christina girl! She was bright, and inquisitive, and was sure that she could be the boss and would be in control if I let her. But I was her mom, and I had the final say. However, she needed to be heard, she needed to make choices for herself, and she needed to know that I loved her and I respected her no matter what. God began to clearly show me that she was my treasure! She was a precious gem, priceless and beyond compare!

Tyler on the other hand, had a natural character more like mine. I never had to ask him how he was feeling: he wore his heart on his sleeve. I understood him more easily and readily, yet he was a boy and that was very different! I needed him to learn to respect me, and to let him know that I respected him as well. God clearly demonstrated to me that he was my heart, that I was to love him with all of mine, but I was to allow him to grow and develop on his own. As much as I dearly desire to, I could not hold on too tightly to my children. I had to realize that I was called to train them up in the way that God wanted them to go, and then eventually I needed to let go and let them be God’s!  They were mine for a time, for a very precious time. But our goal as parents–and my goal as a mom–was to raise up a godly heritage that would be strong and confident in Him and in Him alone so that they could go on to accomplish His will and purposes and continue to build His kingdom here on earth in their generation!

We established rules, we told them the “what” (here are the rules) and the “why” (here is why we should obey them). We told them that we were a family, but the most vital part of our call was not to “talk the talk”, but to “walk the walk!” Our children were going to become who they became, to a large degree because of who and what they saw in us. We lived under the same rules and authority that they did, the same rules that govern them under God, governed us under God!

Today, I am a mama with an empty nest! I still get a catch in my throat and a tear in my eye when I say that. I miss my children every single day! But because of God’s grace and wisdom and faithfulness, I do not worry about them. I enjoy them as the adult children that they are! They are both out there in full-time ministry, using their gifts and passions to change their world and bring people to faith in Jesus. I love them with all of my heart. And they remain to this day my beautiful girl Christina, my treasure. And my handsome son Tyler, my heart!

Truth Bomb:

Your kids are yours for a season. You are to raise them, train them and send them!

My children are God’s first and foremost! We have the unique role as Mother’s to train them, build into them, encourage them and love them unconditionally. Remember that they are only yours for a season-truthfully, they are God’s, and you have the blessing of raising them! Pour into them, pray over them, love them like crazy! The time is short, but the impact is eternal!

Proverbs 24:3 “By wisdom a house is built, and by understanding it is established.” 

See you next week for our final week in our Motherhood series!

 

Speak Truth Love

Four Pictures of Motherhood; A Four generational look at being a Mom.

Week Two: The Devotion Of A Mother’s Heart.

“But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart.” -Luke 2:19

Who but a mother could truly comprehend the deep meaning found within these words? Yet God puts them in His word for all of us to read. Demonstrating the depth of a mother’s love, and the devotion that lies with in her heart.

The devotion of a mother’s heart!

The earliest memories of my mother are of us always being together. I never felt alone! I always knew without a single doubt in my mind that she loved me and cared for me and that I never needed to worry about anything. She held my hand, she dressed me, she fed me, she played with me, she laughed with me, she rocked me, she sang to me, and she made me look forward to each and every day. She made me feel like being a child was the best thing ever! She loved me and my sisters more than anything else in this world! I never felt like she wanted to be away from us. I always felt secure in knowing she wanted to be with us. She was an only child, and she was thrilled to have four daughters. I think she loved the fact that we were all together!

One of the songs I remember her singing was on Saturday mornings when it was time to get up. She would pull the curtains back and sing, “Rise and Shine, Merry Sunshine.” She made everything fun, like it was a game. Even though we didn’t really want to get up, she would tell us she was making french toast, we could watch cartoons for 30 minutes, and then we would need to do our chores. She would kiss and tickle us to get us out of bed. Just the memory of it makes me smile! She even made grocery shopping fun. She would let us select fish sticks, one of our favorites, with green beans, if my dad was going to be out of town. Then she would let us get paper dolls or coloring books. We would take them home and play for hours! She would let us turn our room into a village for our Barbie dolls. We would make houses and shops out of shoe boxes, and dress them and play for hours. She also made each vacation and holiday special from beginning to end. From decorating the tree, to making Christmas cookies, to dancing to Christmas music, to decorating Easter eggs, and even making our outfits for Halloween. Each and every tradition was followed, each and every year!

We looked forward to each with great anticipation. We were a family, and we loved being together!

I never felt like I didn’t matter, or she didn’t have time for me. She never treated one of us any more special than another, yet she was able to uniquely pull out our individual differences and talents. She taught us style and grace by the way she dressed, by the classy way she wore her make up, by the way she did her hair, and by the way she carried herself and talked to other people. She was kind and she was loving, and she was gracious with her speech. My mom didn’t use cuss words, she didn’t smoke or drink, and she cared about the way she looked. Not to an obsessive state, no; but to have pride in herself and the way she presented herself to others. She did the same for us. She always dressed us nicely, taught us how to dress modestly, always did our hair, and with four girls, that is saying a lot!

She always took us to Sunday school. This was not always easy for her, because my dad was not always there with us. But she still took us! She taught us to pray at each meal and at bedtime, and always made Christmas and Easter revolve around Church.

She loved our dad so much, and always demonstrated a great love and desire to be with him, and to have him be with us. She shared in activities with him, some that would not have been her first choice. But she graciously made them a family event. She would take us to each and everyone of his baseball games; we would go out on his boat, which he lovingly named, ‘My Linda’; we would watch football games together on the weekends, and she would make us delicious food to go along with them. She joined in his desire to have horses in our backyard, even though she was frightened by them. We would go deer hunting together on trips that would take us far from home–at one point, clear to Colorado!  She genuinely loved my father, and sacrificed a lot for him.

One of the things that stands out in my memory demonstrating her commitment and love to my father, and our family, was that she worked outside of the home, even though her desire was to be a “stay at home mom.” Her family came first, and it was clear in everything she did.

When I entered my teenage years, I could sense the tension between my mom and dad. It was something I didn’t want to admit was there, but it became evident that it was. My dad was home less and less. His construction business seemed to take him away from home more than ever. I knew my mom wasn’t happy with this, but she never let on to us about it. She would tell us that everything was fine, and that she loved us very, very much! When he was away, she would make it fun for us. She would let us choose what we wanted for dinner; she would pick movies and we would watch them together. We would go places like the Crocker Art Museum in downtown Sacramento, or the public library. She didn’t sit on the couch and sulk, and she didn’t cry in front of us, feeling sorry for herself. She truly made the best of every day and brought love and joy into our lives despite the circumstances. As I look back on those times now, I see the strength she demonstrated out of her devotion to us, her children.

She taught me more about unconditional love through those long days, then I could have ever learned any other way. She loved her daughters with all of her heart. And even though her own heart was breaking, her devotion to us remained steadfast! I know that we are all the mothers that we are today, because of her example.

When my dad was going through his struggle to stay faithful and committed to his family, money became a big issue. He would get angry at my mom and tell her that she demanded too much, spent too much, and was always asking for money. As the oldest, I could see that she was just trying to take care of her daughters. I remember one time asking my father for a dress for the prom. It was not one of his good seasons, and he yelled at me. My mom found a way to save up enough money to buy me a dress at an outlet. She did my hair, and she made me feel beautiful. I was her little girl and she held me in her heart.

My mother loved my father and her children with a strong devotion. She never wanted a divorce from my father, but he was unfaithful and ultimately that is what happened. Changes came after my mother and father divorced, and they were hard.

My mother remarried eventually and that brought in another family. There were adjustments, difficulties, and at times pain and tears. But through it all my mother kept her daughters near and dear to her heart. We knew no one would really ever take our place in her mother’s heart. As I look back over those past 38 years, I am thankful, humbled, and honored by the amount of love and dedication she has shown to her family. She has stayed married, loyal and faithful to her husband for these past 38 years. Even after the divorce, she accepted my dad into our family holidays and activities, including him with grace. Remarkably, over time my dad and her husband actually became good friends. She never badmouthed my dad to his daughters, and even when I was angry and didn’t want to be around him, she told me he was my father, and he deserved my love and respect. And she made sure I knew he always loved me! She demonstrated loyalty by being a good daughter-in-law to my father’s parents, and sister-in-law to my father’s sisters.

She loved and reached out to her uncle Art, and both sides of her parent’s family.  She was a faithful, loving daughter to her parents all of their lives! She graciously cared for them when they were sick, always having them be a part of all of our holidays and events. She truly showed us how to respect and love your parents, through the way she loved hers. She and her husband paid for many family vacations for all of us to be a part of, and opened their home for big family gatherings. She always opened her home, and still does to this day, for any visitors to stay in.

She accepted and welcomed her stepchildren into the family, and worked hard to make everyone feel an important part of the family. She always supported her children, grandchildren, and now great-grandchildren, by babysitting, helping out, and buying gifts. She set the bar high for being a grandma! One I can only hope to attain. She loves them all dearly, and they all dearly love her! She truly holds each and everyone of them in her heart as well as her children. Her grandchildren still request her world famous french toast, every time they are at her house! She was always there when you needed a phone call for advice or support. She accepted her son-in-laws as her own sons and even her grandkid’s spouses have come to love her and even call her “Grammie.”

She speaks the truth in love, and sometimes says what you need to hear, even if you don’t want to hear it. She did not take sides in her kid’s marital squabbles, but always assured us that it was worth working it out. She has a wisdom for pointing out the good traits about each person.

My mom is truly extraordinary! She demonstrated that family comes first and that love is unconditional! That a family member always deserves forgiveness and is never beyond restoration. Because of her forgiveness and restoration with my father, we were all able to heal and have a right relationship with him.

I am confident of this one thing: my mother holds me in her heart and is devoted to me. I am never truly farther than a heartbeat away.

Truth Bomb:

An ordinary Mother who loves her family unconditionally becomes extraordinary.

I have an extraordinary Mom. She has always held me close to her heart and loved me unconditionally. Perhaps you haven’t had a Mom like that, and this description doesn’t make any sense to you. The truth is, whether you’ve had an amazing example of a Mom or a disappointing one, God wants you to be the Mom He created you to be! One that leaves your children loved unconditionally, so they can get a glimpse of how their Heavenly Father loves them unconditionally. You have the opportunity to turn the ordinary into the extraordinary through God’s strength!

Speak Truth Love

Four Pictures of Motherhood: A Four Generational Look at Being A Mom

Week 1: The legacy of a godly Mother/Grandmother

“Unless the Lord builds the house, it’s laborers labor in vain.” -Psalm 127:1

I promised you a series on motherhood, and that is a lot to bite off! I am in no way implying that I am an expert on the subject. I just happen to have a relationship with the God who it is. I also know from first-hand experience that He fills in all the blanks. When you don’t have the words to say, He gives you the words. When you say words you wish you wouldn’t have said, He gives you humility to ask for forgiveness and to use that opportunity as a teaching experience. When you feel exhausted, He gives you the strength to keep on keeping on. When you want to pull your hair out, He gives you the peace that truly surpasses all of our understanding, and He allows you to get it together again.

Much more than the experience that I have had in being a mother, is what I experienced by the two wonderful mothers God graciously placed in my life! They are my Grandma, Lela, and my Mom Linda.

For decades now the world has tried to re-define what being a mother is. We get mixed messages and it messes with us!

Take care of your self-put yourself first so that you have enough to give back; you don’t need a husband, any dad for your child will do; it does not matter the amount of hours a day that you spend with your child; If you have a lot of money and are a truly great mom, give your child everything they want; educate your child in the best school and make sure their test scores are high…the world gives us so many messages!

And just in case you think I am advocating  raising kids in the church alone, we have not always done such a great job ourselves. We put such pressure on moms to be what we defined they should be, that we are making women neurotic, feel like failures, or making young women not even want to take the step of motherhood because they are afraid of failing.

According to some, you have to be a stay-at-home mom or you’re not a good mom; you have to homeschool or you’re not really a great mom; you definitely have to breast-feed or you will literally destroy your child for life! You have to have a perfect home with a bedroom for each child, and preferably their own bathroom. Do not tell them too much of what to do either. You must let them experience it for themselves, because a “good Christian mother” is loving and kind at all times, she never loses her temper, and she always has more than enough patience for her children.

This kind of ideal scenario sounds like getting a fast pass to every ride at Disneyland! And you didn’t even have to pay to get in: someone gave it to you! You have everything handed to you and you never learn to earn anything.

There has to be a balance. A place in between the two, where we can glean from the wisdom of those that have gone before us, and look to the one and only book that truly does define being a mother: The Bible!

“The B-I-B L-E, yes that’s the book for me! I stand up tall on the word of God, the B-I-B L-E, BIBLE!”

As I write those words to you, I see the picture of my Grandma’s face! Lela May Welty, Switter…she’s saying those words to me over and over again with the sweetest soprano voice that I have ever heard. She was never trained professionally to sing, but oh how she loved to sing! I’ve talked about her in past posts…She was the most beautiful woman in the world to me, she set the stage for having a signature color, before it was a thing. My grandma loved pink! She put it in her home, and she wore it beautifully. Until the day Jesus called her home she dressed up so beautifully for church and always wore patent leather heels. She was elegance and grace. She was kind and loving and accepting of every single person she met.

It wasn’t the words she said, or the book that she wrote(she didn’t write a book), that taught me what motherhood looked like. It was the way she lived her life. Nothing, and I mean nothing that she did was apart from Jesus! Yes, she would say to me, “Jesus loves you Lisa Kay. He died for you, and you are the most important person to Him.” But it wasn’t just her words, but her actions that instilled that truth into my heart. She would get up every morning and put her feet on the floor and say,

“This is the day the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it.”  Psalm 118:24

I watched her do that as her heart would break. First, seeing one sister lost to dementia, another sister lost to cancer, her husband rushed to the hospital in an ambulance from our house after having a heart attack, and yet day after day, she would continue to put her feet on the floor each morning regardless of her circumstances.

I watched her cooked meals and take them to people who were bound to their house. I watched her teach Sunday school, and vacation Bible school every year. I watched her make dinner every night for my grandpa, she would always make comments like, Oh, this is his favorite!” And “Grandpa always likes Jell-O at the end of his meal.” And “Grandpa loves ham, although it isn’t good for him. I give it to him only on special occasions!” She would tell me how proud she was of him for how hard he worked. She would even take me to the college campus where he worked on the maintenance crew. She would walk me around and introduce me to everyone and tell them that I was Gilbert Switters granddaughter, with such pride. She had dinner waiting for him when he came home. She washed and cleaned his clothes, she got him all of his favorite things, and she did it all why she herself worked full-time, cooking at a high school cafeteria.

She taught me how to bake! She would let me pull up a chair, turn it around, come up to the counter with her and teach me how to put the batter in first and whip it until it was creamy. Then add the sugar slowly, then the vanilla, and then the eggs one at a time. This made the best cookies ever!

She loved my mom, her one and only daughter, with greater love than I had seen in anyone before. She would look at her and lean over into my ear and say, “isn’t she beautiful!?” She would drive up with my grandpa from Arizona where they lived, every Christmas with a Tupperware full of homemade Christmas cookies and a trunk full of beautifully wrapped Christmas gifts for all of us. She did not have much money, but what money she had she shared with us!

She made my sisters and I five school dresses every year to start school. She bought us black patent leather shoes for fall and winter for church, and white patent leather shoes for Easter and spring. She made us our Christmas dresses, and our Easter dresses to match every year! Yes, I said made, not bought! She demonstrated to me her love and commitment to us by the time and effort she put in to making all of those dresses. My baby sister was too small at the time, but my other two sisters and I received those dresses every single year. Times three, that is fifteen dresses to start each school year, three dresses for Christmas and three dresses for Easter!

But more than all of these things put together, she taught me to love God! Not because she told me to, or she made me go to church with her, but because of the way she acted, because of the word she spoke, because of the prayer she said with me at night, because of the way she held my hand and walked with me, because of the way she went to church because she wanted to, because of the way that she opened her Bible, every day and read from God’s Word!

My grandma lived out the unconditional love that God calls us as mothers to have for our children and grandchildren every day of her life! She gave when she had little or nothing to give, she cooked and prepared when she didn’t really have enough time. She bought fabric and sewed when it took every spare minute she had, and she served and loved God because He was the Lord of her life, He was her friend, and she desired to spend time with Him! That made this little girl want to love Him too and want to have Him as her friend!

My grandmother truly lived out the verse, “Unless The Lord builds the house, the laborers labor in vain.” -Psalm 127:1

She was not attempting to do this thing called motherhood by herself. She was trusting in the Lord her God to accomplish it through her! And boy did He! I not only saw what it meant to be a good mother through her life, I saw what it meant to completely love and trust in her Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Thank you, Grandma, for helping me to see what Godly motherhood truly looks like!

Truth Bomb:

The world has turned motherhood into more of a production of what we can put out, and produce, rather than a relationship.

Your children will remember the time you spend together and the special things you do for them, just as I do with my Grandma. They will remember the acts of love you show them and what you sacrifice for them. They will remember the truths you teach them. They will know how great the Father’s love is for them, because of you.

Don’t allow the world’s and especially social media’s picture of Motherhood to pressure you into trying to “put out” great children. Remember, being a mother is truly a gift from God; a relationship that you are blessed to have. Enjoy that relationship, and rejoice in the day that God has given you!

Remember, “This is the day the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it.”

My grandmother gave me her pearls, some of her “pink” glass that adorned her living room as long as my memory goes back, her treasured recipes that we made together, her grace, her dignity, but more than anything, my grandma gave me the example of her devout love and dedication to her Lord Jesus Christ!  My grandma showed me through the way she lived, not just through the words she spoke, that being a mom meant loving like Jesus! It meant going the extra mile whether you had the energy to or not. It meant giving forgiveness when forgiveness wasn’t due, it meant laughing together, crying together, praying together, and always, no matter what, loving unconditionally with a pure heart.

Motherhood means pointing your child or grandchild to Jesus! Not just simply through the words you speak, but through the life you live!

Speak Truth Love

“There remains, then, a Sabbath-rest for the people of God; for anyone who enters God’s rest also rests from their works, just as God did from his.” -Hebrews 4:9-10

God blessed me with a vacation this past week. I could say it was okay, but that would be a gross understatement, and this is a blog on TRUTH!

It was perfect in every way but one; it came to an end too fast! Seven days of beautiful scenery, gorgeous cool weather, green hills covered in yellow floral splendor,  hikes down unknown paths, taste-testing new foods from bakeries, to 4 barrel espresso! Sublime walks holding my hubby’s hand, and dreaming our dreams together. Long mornings and quiet devotionals, followed by  dinners in new and unknown restaurants! Driving further north between yet more green covered hills lined with beautiful vineyards, to meet up with and spend time with beloved family members whom we don’t see often enough! Sharing my favorite worship with my favorite people on the weekend!

…And now, I find myself driving back to face the work week on Highway 5!

Was it worth it? Not only was it worth it, but it is commanded by my God!

God desires for each of us to enter into rest–HIS REST! We work hard, we give God our best, and in our crazy busy schedules, He desires that we take time to rest. His desire is not that we simply “take a nap.” His desire is that we rest in Him! That we pray, that we take time to be still and know that He is God, that we take in with our eyes and ears and our senses the smell that He is truly God; simply by experiencing the world that He created. That we relax and we take a walk in it, that we observe the beauty of it, and that we take time to listen to someone else that we care about, and share what we are thinking and feeling with that person.

One day out of my seven days of “rest”, I felt God’s presence especially. We got up early and took a morning walk through the city by the bay. We hiked up and over several hills to a special place where sweet smells of baked goods were filling the air all around it! Arriving to the counter, the temptation was strong to just select one of everything in the delectable case of baked goods in front of us! But with all of the self-control we could muster, we picked two fresh baked morning buns. The temptation was great to immediately sink our teeth into the cinnamon, sugar treat in front of us. But our quest that morning and had only just begun! So we resisted, and we hiked on through the streets of San Francisco, four blocks over, and five blocks up to our next destination! The sign read “Four Barrel Coffee”.  The aroma of beautifully roasted coffee beans, was wafting through the air and led us straight to our destination before our eyes ever caught sight of the sign!

We carried our coffee in hand accompanied by the brown paper sack that held our delicious morning buns to our final destination for the morning: Dolores Park! We climbed a bit higher and a bit farther then we had intended but upon reaching the top of the park we sat on a bench ready to open up our sack and dig our teeth into our delectable treat. We looked up at that moment and our breath stopped! Surrounding us was a panoramic view of the city of San Francisco, with the beautiful Pacific ocean surrounding it! My mind and heart could only focus on the splendor of my God and Creator! I sat in all of His beauty and could only thank Him. The thought of buying a morning bun and cappuccino seemed to fade from my memory as I sat and thanked my God for all that He had created.

My average work week does not lend to moments like that! Yes I talk with Him, I certainly walk with Him through all of my daily responsibilities, and at night I thank Him for my day. But it takes a purposed time away, to “Rest in Him,” and slow down long enough to hear Him speak to me, even through the beauty of His glorious creation! I am thankful for rest, and I am even more thankful for a God who cares so much about me to desire that I take a time of rest from my responsibilities!

Truth Bomb:

Rest is a gift from God when we allow it to be.

God calls us to come into His rest. He is waiting there for us, to walk with him, to talk with him, and to rest in His goodness. It is there that we find peace! We learn to relax and trust in Him. Do you understand that He is in control and will take care of all of our needs?

So as I find myself at the end of that time of rest, heading back down Highway 5, with headlights glaring at me from across the highway, I still have a peace, the peace from God that surpasses all understanding! The true peace of God that will give me strength, give me confidence, and supply me with everything I need to live my life every day the way God desires me to live it! I will go from this place of rest in Him, to take on the challenges of the days ahead, knowing His peace is ruling in my heart!

Philippians 4:7 says, “And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.”

May you find rest in Him and experience His presence in a whole new way. May you allow Him to speak Truth to you as you lean into His loving arms and abide in Him.

Coming Up: A four week series on MOMS!

       Speak Truth Love

Another Easter is in the books! And today I’m a bit melancholy. Easter has always been a very special holiday for me. Since I was a little girl, it was the day my sisters and I looked forward to with excitement! We got brand-new patent leather shoes, and they were white because it was Spring. We got to pick out new Easter dresses that matched most of the time-except for being in different colors. We anticipated the family egg hunt, with my cousins, aunts and uncles. There were plenty of eggs and goodies for everyone, but the most treasured and sought after egg was the “hallelujah egg!”  The finder of that egg got a special prize! Easter was a time for family, for having fun together, and for going to church.

When I was younger, I knew that going to church was the central part of Easter, but I did not understand the true significance. I just knew it was an important holiday. Isn’t it true that much of the time we celebrate holidays, we have every clothing and decorative detail down, but we can miss the holiday’s true meaning?

The clothes we wear, that menu we serve, the decor in our homes, the place settings, the baskets filled to the brim sitting on the hearth…yes even the resurrection eggs. We try and teach our children the true meaning of Easter, but amidst all of the celebration, does it stay with us after Easter is over? Do we take the true meaning of Easter, and live it every day in our lives so that Jesus truly lives in our hearts every day of the year?

After the last chocolate bunny is eaten, after the last jelly bean is found in the corners of the couch, after the last hard boiled Easter egg is turned into an egg salad sandwich, what remains with you?

If we are missing the transforming power of Jesus’ resurrection, we are missing the most significant piece of our faith! Without that, you miss the truth of Easter. We are missing the truth that forever changed the world!

Without the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, everything we do for the rest of the year in Christianity and in His name, holds no significance. If Jesus lives, and if He lives powerfully in our hearts every day of the year, then Easter truly never ends!

 

I serve a risen Savior, he’s in the world today, He walks with me, he talks with me, a long life every way! He lives, He lives! He brings His salvation to us each and every day. He lives within our hearts, every day we live for him!

So, how do you and I take this “Risen life” and live it every day? Well let’s take a lesson from the disciples. Those who walked with him physically on the earth for three years. They saw a Jesus resurrected, alive and supernaturally well! They walked with him and talked with him in his resurrected body, and what did that relationship do to their lives?

There was something radically remarkable about the disciples lives immediately following the resurrection of Jesus! Peter, the one who denied Jesus three times, who was grieved in his spirit for failing Jesus to the point of weeping bitterly, declared emphatically,

“As for us, we cannot stop speaking about the things that we have seen and heard!” Acts 4:20

And he said that face to face with a hostile Jewish audience! Nothing could silence his joy! He had to tell everybody!

Truth bomb:

Jesus’ tomb is empty so that our hearts can be full!

What about you? Who do you tell? Who can see the joy through the life that you live?

What is it that you and I could not stop talking about? Is it the latest trend? Is it the latest sale at Nordstrom? The latest TV show? The latest political debate? Who should be the next Bachelor or Bachelorette? Who should be on Dancing with the stars?

Or rather, is it what Jesus did for you, today?  How did He help you mend a fence with a neighbor, or bring healing words to a friend?  How did He help you say an encouraging word to your spouse, or maybe just help you hold your tongue? Did He help you make a difficult decision, or did He lift your spirit when nothing else could?  That is resurrection power, demonstrating how Jesus is living and reigning in your heart!

Let’s take a one week challenge, and let our thoughts and speech reflect how Jesus is Risen and filling our hearts with joy. Ask God to bring someone across your path, to whom you–like Peter–won’t be able to “stop speaking about all that you have seen and heard!”

Speak Truth Love

“I serve a risen Savior; He’s in the world today, I know that He is with me, whatever man may say. I see His hand of mercy, I hear His Voice of cheer. And just the time I need Him, he’s always near.

He lives, He lives, Christ Jesus lives TODAY! He walks with me and talks with me along life’s narrow way. He lives, He lives, salvation to impart. You ask me how I know He lives? He lives within my heart!”

I want to introduce you to the greatest example of a Christian that I have ever known: My grandma, Lela Switter! She wasn’t famous, she didn’t have a lot of money, she came from humble means; she wasn’t a scholar, never wrote a book, and she never held a degree from an educational institution. In fact, she never went past a junior high school education. She came from a family of eight children and was seventh in line. She didn’t grow up in a fancy house or in a large town. She came from Wadsworth, Ohio: a small country suburb to Akron. Her mother and her father had less of a formal education than she did. But no one could hold a candle to the light that shone inside of her! She didn’t just say she knew Jesus; she lived Jesus!

She was kind and loving to everyone she met. I never heard her speak a harsh word to anyone. She was the first to help out anyone in need. In fact, one of my earliest memories of her was watching her serve Meals on Wheels!

She showed me an amazing example of what a true Christian wife should be; she loved my grandfather and respected him. She loved to put a smile on his face, and he loved her cooking, and she always topped it off with “Jell-O” at the end of every meal. That was his favorite! None of the rest of us ate it, but she still made it and served it to him after every meal.

She was a good listener. She always had time for you, no matter how busy her schedule was. She was also a hard worker! I remember her taking me and my sisters proudly to her place of employment, a high school cafeteria, where she helped prepare lunches for the high school students and helped serve them and clean up after them every single day. Nothing was beneath her. She did everything with a smile on her face, joy in her heart, and it shined out of every ounce of her being.

She taught vacation Bible school every summer at her church, and always brought the best dishes to each and every potluck. She faithfully taught the two and three year-olds in Sunday school all the years that she was alive here on earth! She heard me get angry at my sisters, and she calmly instructed me “that would not make Jesus happy,” and I needed to tell them I was sorry. She always cared about making relationships right between my loved ones. Yes, she knew it was hard, but she would say, “we can do anything through God’s strength!”

I remember the day like it was yesterday, I was a teenager, and was sitting in the back of a small church chapel. My sisters were all up front, standing beside my mom. She was getting married for the second time, and I just couldn’t accept it. My grandma sat down beside me, not saying a word and just grabbed my hands. She sat there with me for quite a while, and we both stared straight ahead. I looked at her and she could see the tears in my eyes. I was torn. I knew my dad had been unfaithful to my mom. I knew my mom wasn’t really doing anything wrong, but still my heart was breaking! My grandma seem to understand all that I was feeling.

I don’t remember if the words actually came out of my mouth, or if she just could read them inside, but she put her other hand over mine and quietly said, “Lisa Kay, if you don’t walk up there and stand beside your mom, you will regret it for the rest of your life.” I do remember my words coming out, “But Grammie, I don’t think I can make it down the aisle by myself.” She said, very confidently, “You’re not walking alone.  Jesus is with you every step of the way.” I walked down that aisle, and to this day I still don’t know how I made it.

My Grammie taught be truth by the way she lived her life. She had forgiven time after time after time, and now she was asking me to step out in that same trust, and in that same forgiveness. She was showing me like she had done countless times before: to live Jesus, not just talk about him. That day, the next day after that, and every day since,  I have been so overwhelmingly thankful that my grandma helped me do the right thing.

My Grammie walked and talked Jesus! She told me that others will know Jesus when they see him living in you and through you! She didn’t just tell me to do it, she showed me how to do it through the life that she lived.

She taught me the song that I quoted in the opening. She loved to sing! She had such a sweet, sweet voice. She told me that in another life she was sure that she was a famous singer! “You ask me how I know he lives? He lives within my heart!”  She taught me to memorize the words to that song with her voice, but she taught me the truth of that song through her life!

I miss my grandma every single day. I sleep with her picture framed next to my bed. I put my feet on the floor every morning and I say, “This is the day the Lord has made; I will rejoice and be glad in it,” because my Grammie taught me to do that! But my joy is in knowing that I will see my Grammie again someday in heaven-because Jesus lived inside of her heart and He lives inside of my heart too!

 

I serve a risen Savior! He walks with me, and he talks with me every single time I need a friend, and every time I need encouragement. He walks with me, and he talks with me every time I feel so low that I don’t think I can pick my head back up-whether along life’s narrow way, when life is hard and restrictive or along life’s wide path, when life is beautiful! His salvation is my gift each and every day. And you ask me how I know he lives? Because he lives in my heart!

This is the week before Easter. This week we celebrate the last week of Jesus’ life here on Earth. It is a week of reflection, a week of thankfulness, and a week of rejoicing, as we celebrate Jesus’ victory over death!

I serve a risen Savior! He’s not in a grave, the stone has been rolled away from the tomb! He lives!

“Why are you looking among the dead for someone who is alive? He isn’t here! He is risen from the dead!” – Luke 24:5-6

TRUTH BOMB:

Don’t leave Jesus on the cross, He lives in the world and in YOU today!

I challenge you to not leave Him on the cross! I challenge you to not leave Him in the grave! I challenge you to not allow him to just be a belief. He is your living Savior! We serve a risen Savior; He is in the world today! Amen!

Speak Truth Love

“Rainy days and Mondays always get me down…” To quote the lyrics from a classic Carpenters song from my childhood. It’s not really the rainy days that get me down. It’s not the dreariness; I love rainy days. I’ve already made that clear in a past blog post. It’s more the fact that it’s raining and it’s Monday, the day I have to get up and go to work. I would rather snuggle up next to the fire with a warm blanket and a good book, drink my cappuccino slowly, and enjoy the rainy Monday.

So what is it that really gets us down? Is it the the fact that we have to do something that we don’t want to do? Is it something that we are afraid of, or is it something that we doubt we are good enough to accomplish?

The lyrics to the song just may give us a clue…Feeling old and want to quit? Does nothing seem to fit? Do you feel like you don’t belong? Or, is there really nothing you can pinpoint is wrong?

The answer is: all of the above! Anyone of these feelings is real and can paralyze us. So what do we do when the feelings overwhelm us? We absolutely have to go to the Word of God!

I open up the pages to the Word of God, and I find a story about David. No, not David the young shepherd boy filling his sling with a choice stone and killing the giant. Rather, fast forward 10 years to the man David, now fighting against discouragement and potential rebellion from his own followers. David finds himself, not in the rich green pastures caring for his flock, but in the dry desert wilderness with 600 of his followers and their families, including his own family.

They return from war to find their entire community attacked, taken captive, plundered and pillaged! And all their wives and children, including David’s, dragged away.

When David and his men discovered all this, they all wept aloud until they had no strength left to weep. That is sobbing from the inside out. And what is worse, is that at that moment of despair, David’s men turn to him in anger and want to stone him. Talk about kicking someone when they’re down. Even their very own godly leader.

So what is David to do with all this? Go hide in his bed, pull the covers up over his head, stay in his pajamas all day long, and hide from the world? Should he have gotten angry and have started screaming at his men and say, “How dare you go against me! I am your leader!”

No, David didn’t do any of those things. Instead, David turned to God!

God is the lifter of my head, not my circumstances. 

David did not quit; he went to the Lord instead. He went to the Lord first, not after trying to handle it on his own. He then went to the priest and sought God for his next steps to take.

The Lord said to David, “Pursue them,” he answered. “You will certainly overtake them and succeed in the rescue.” -1 Samuel 30:8

And read it for yourself: that is exactly what happened! They rescued all of their

family members, all of their belongings, and not a single person was killed. All because David was faithful to God, and God’s power showed miraculously in David’s life!

God wants to show His power miraculously in your life and in mine! All we have to do is take our eyes off the rain, off of our circumstances, off of our mood and off of ourselves. We instead need to put our eyes on Him and His word!

Are you willing to read the word of God and to allow it to miraculously transform your mood? God truly can turn our down days upward, when we turn our eyes upward to Him!

A Psalm of David:

“Lord, how they increase that trouble me; many are they that rise up against me. Many are they who say to my soul, ‘there is no help for him in God.’ But thou, oh Lord, are a shield about me; my glory, and the lifter up of my head. I cried unto the Lord with my voice, and he heard me out of his holy hill.” Psalm 3

Can rainy days and Mondays get us down? Of course they can! So, how are we going to respond?

What are your rainy days and Mondays? Do you allow those circumstances to dictate the way you act, the way you feel, the fact that you are so down sometimes that you feel you can’t get back up?

Or, are you willing to take a few extra steps in to the place where you can open up God’s word, and read the truth in its pages? It can and will transform your attitude!

TRUTH BOMB:

Rain or Shine, The Lord My God Is My Comfort Every Day!

Friends, let’s trust God to do exactly what He says He can do! Let’s take God at His word by actually opening up its pages! God’s word will transform our attitudes and our lives. Let’s dig in together! God’s word will transform our lives each and every day, if we let it!

                       Speak Truth Love

I’m rocking my rain boots today, which is a  rare occasion in Southern California! I love the rain, it reminds me of home, which is Northern California. I get excited when it rains! I run and put on my rain boots and rain gear, and after the excitement fades a bit, the melancholy sets in. Northern California is home to me; it’s where my heart goes when I close my eyes and think of home. I prefer the lush green grass, and the streets lined with beautiful trees almost creating an arch as you drive through them. The rushing rivers that mark the highways, and intersect with each other pouring into the Delta. I miss the distinct seasons, though mild, they are distinct. The cold frost of winter turns into the rains of late winter and early spring, which brings flowers that pop up everywhere. I miss the clear blue skies that direct your view to the snow peaked mountain tops of the Sierras. I miss the rain storms that can get so fierce that you stay inside praying one of the trees in your yard doesn’t fall. I miss the Autumn when the rolling hills turn golden, and leaves fall to the ground in bright, beautiful colors. And yes, I even miss the dry hot summers that cause us to go to the rivers and beautiful Lake Tahoe to gain some reprieve from the heat. I would be content to live in Northern California all the days of my life!

Although, I write with the longing to be there, that is not where God has placed me. So therefore, I have a choice to make: I must choose to be content where God has placed me. It is a choice, I can choose to relish in the infrequent rainy days of Southern California, or be discontent in my longing to be where it rains more often.

I’m rocking my rain boots today and choosing to be content in the weather God gives me. I wish I could pull these cute boots out of the closet more often, but I am content to enjoy the rainy days God brings to Southern California, and not complain about the ones he does not!

CONTENTMENT= “satisfaction; the state of being satisfied, ease of mind, comfort.”

What is contentment? Is it settling for what we don’t have? Is it excepting what the world has shoved at us? Or is there a deeper biblical meaning to contentment?

Could it be that we have once again allowed the world to define the term for us? Or are we just discontent in our own selfishness of not having what we want?

The world defines contentment like this: a state of being satisfied and comfortable.

This definition leaves us with an “ease”, but not a true peace. This is because the missing ingredient is the state of our being. It is about who we are, not what our circumstances have made us. It is about who we choose to be!

I shared in my last blog post that I struggle with contentment. It felt like a bad word to me. It made me feel like I was settling, like I was being lazy, like I wasn’t putting forth enough effort to make something happen other than the situation I was discontent with. However, when I look further into the word of God, and let it define contentment for me, I find it is not a bad word at all!

1 Timothy 6:6 says, “But godliness with contentment is great gain.”

It is in choosing to live godly lives, that we are able to find true contentment!

Living godly lives. Now that is a big prescription to fill! It’s not an impossible task however, when we put our hope and trust in Him, We must allow Him to be our strength.

If we make Him the priority of our lives, and put His Word in us, so His Holy Spirit can shine through and illuminate the path He has us on.

You see My Rain Boots would not, on their own, lead me down a street in Southern California. My rain boots would prefer to walk a river path in the “City of Trees”, Sacramento!  I have to chose to let His Spirit fill my being, and chose to allow Him to guide and direct my steps, and He leads my rain boots down a dry path. Much of the time laden with sand, and just occasionally sprinkled with rain!

The choice after allowing Him to fill my being, and walk in His righteousness is this: Will I be content where He has placed my feet and find  joy on those occasional rainy days? Or will I allow discontentment to mark me while I grumble and complain that it doesn’t rain enough?

Contentment is not settling. True contentment is only found when you are putting in the effort! Settling is excepting what you have and not doing anything about it.

Once again, the choice is mine because contentment is a state of being. My inner being must be connected to God’s Spirit first and foremost. Then, and only then will I even come close to living the righteous life He has called me too, and BONUS, find contentment through it!

Paul says, “I have learned the secret of being content in each and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.” Philippians 4:12

“Content in all circumstances…” Allows me to put forth the effort to have contentment in my life through my choices.

How do I practice this?

Saturday morning is my Sabbath, my downtime, the only morning in my seven day week where I can sleep in at all, take it slow, and have some quiet time. It used to be that I was up at the crack of dawn on Saturday mornings, driving miles to a Volleyball tournament, or packing sandwiches, orange wedges, and cold water bottles for soccer games all day! Now I am what is commonly referred to as an “Empty Nester.”

My two beautiful children are now grown adults and on their own. I loved the busy schedules my children had, and even more, I loved supporting them through it. I remained in the classroom as a teacher until our youngest graduated from high school. The year he left for college found me moving from the classroom to an office, now in charge of all of the Elementary Classrooms as Principal.

Saturday Mornings are now “sacred” to me! They are the brief period in my busy week when my “To Do List” is not begging to be completed. When no one is asking me a question or giving me a problem to solve. When I can actually hear myself think, and be quiet enough to “Be Still” before God.

Why then would I give up my precious Saturday morning and attend a Missions Training?

I got up to an early alarm, pumping the coffee and heading over to church for a México Team training meeting with 40 others from my church Saturday morning. I am so excited to go on our missions trip, but the day and time of this meeting certainly wasn’t my choice after the intense week at work I had experienced. When we arrived, we started studying and discovering God’s vision for the Nations, beginning with Abraham. God blessed him for his nearly blind faith and obedience to leave home and go to a distant land he knew nothing about. God chose that Patriarch to be a blessing to the nations, through his family and through Jesus, his most significant descendant.

It was then that I realized that the day or the start time of this meeting really didn’t matter! What DID matter is that we, who are blessed by God to be a blessing to others, have the privilege of sharing God’s love and grace with others far away, whom we have never met. We get to extend God’s grace and hope to them as well. Doing God’s will, sharing His love and joining God in His work: THAT is what really brings me contentment!

 

TRUTH BOMB

Contentment is not based on our circumstances but on Christ alone!

“The fear of The Lord leads to life; then one rests CONTENT, untouched by trouble.” Proverbs 19:23

When I  “Fear The Lord”, respect Him, honor Him, put Him first in my life above my comfort, I AM CONTENT. I do not become a victim to the “troubles” of this world. God becomes my strength, and even though troubles come, He lifts me above them, and takes me through them and I find true CONTENTMENT!

Speak Truth Love

Enjoyment: What a topic!

I mean, if we spent every day going to Disneyland, lounging by the pool, watching the waves roll up from the ocean, or eating hot fudge sundaes, it would be a simple topic, right? However, that is far from the reality of our daily lives!

Most days, our lives are full of responsibilities, timelines, deadlines, grumpy people, dirty dishes, loads of laundry…you fill in the blank.

In this crazy, ‘dog eat dog’ world that we live in, even in our “nice Christian” circles, life can be anything but enjoyable. Yet God calls out to us to enjoy ourselves. To enjoy this creation that He made. To enjoy this life that He gave to us. Although, that is not always an easy task.

This past week was a really difficult one for me. I found myself with more to complete and do than there were hours in the day for. I found myself coming home late every night, still, with an uncompleted check list.

Just so you know, Mondays are the worst for me. Not just because Mondays are the beginning of my work week, but they are also my husband’s day off. Now, that’s just throwing fuel on the fire!

Not to mention, I was entering the countdown to a very difficult deadline at work. I made it through this past Monday, by the grace of God, and was heading home just after dark. I had been too busy that weekend to shop, and I needed to pick up some groceries for dinner. I automatically turned my car in the direction of my neighborhood grocery store, but then it occurred to me. Why not go to the new Whole Foods they had just opened up down the street? I could slowly cruise down the aisles and look at all of the items I could not afford to buy, and then pick up one or two that I loved. I could peruse the sandwich bar, the salad bar, the pastry bar, and maybe even treat myself at the coffee bar! I was feeling enjoyment at just the thought of Whole Foods.

It has been one of my families favorite places for years. There is one right around the corner from my mom and sister’s house, and one within walking distance of my son and daughter-in-law’s house. I have been waiting for one to open close to us for a long time!

Enjoyment came to me as I reflected on all of the special times my family and I have spent there. We had a recent visit with our son and daughter-in-law, and took a lovely walk to the fountains by their house. We went into Whole Foods and had a coffee, accompanied by one of the best cookies I have ever tasted in my life! My daughter-in-law turned me onto a cookie called, “the kitchen sink.” It is everything delicious in one cookie! I thought of the times my mom and sisters and I had gone on a morning walk from my mom’s house and sat and shared coffee and conversation together. As you can see, Whole Foods brings up all kinds of memories of enjoyment for me.

My heart was already filling with warm thoughts, and it was helping turn a difficult day into a better one. I pulled into the parking spot right up front, I walked in and there, to my left was the coffee bar. My eyes read the menu and I discovered they not only had cappuccinos, but gelato as well! My husband’s favorite! I found the darkest chocolate gelato they had and asked for a cup to go. I asked for the largest nonfat cappuccino they make–the mega grandissimo! I was feeling enjoyment inside knowing that Jim would be excited when he came home from his men’s meeting and I had a cup of gelato waiting for him. It got even better-the woman behind the counter handed me my cappuccino, and on the cup it said, “ENJOY COFFEE.” Could it be any more perfect? That is exactly what I intended to do!

Maybe it was the difficulty of my day, maybe it was simply the delicious flavor, but that cappuccino was the best I have ever had. I strolled down the aisle sipping it’s deliciousness, savoring the  foam and strong espresso. In that moment my mood was lifted! God was speaking to me, in the little issues and in the big issues of life.

I have a decision to make: Am I going to enjoy my life and allow God’s goodness to shine through the good times as well as the bad times? Or am I simply going to focus on the not so enjoyable parts?

I love that God has a sense of humor! I love that He teaches me exactly what I need to know, even before I know I need it.

I find it completely comical that He put it on my heart this week to write about ENJOYMENT, when I am going through one of the most stressful seasons of my year.

I feel like I’m barely holding my head above water most days, let alone “ENJOYING MYSELF!”

However, when I pause, and give myself a moment to reflect on something other then my “stress”, I see that there is enjoyment all around me. When I am the most stressed, the most frazzled, the most pushed to my limits, where exhaustion makes me want to sleep standing up…that is when I need these moments of enjoyment more than ever!

God’s word calls to me, and brings enjoyment as I listen to the truth of His word:

Ecclesiastes 3:12-13; ” I know that there is nothing better for men then to be happy and do good while they live. That everyone may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all his toil- THIS IS THE GIFT OF GOD!”

And also, Ecclesiastes 5:19; “Moreover, when God gives any man wealth and possessions, and enables him to enjoy them, to except his lot and be happy in his work- THIS IS A GIFT FROM GOD.”

Are you catching this? It hit me like a slap across the face! Lisa, wake up! Do you understand that when you work, when you toil, I can give you enjoyment through it, and as a result, it is a gift from Me to you?

Are we too stressed out at the beginning of our day to enjoy a beautiful sunrise? Or are we too tired and frustrated at the end of our day to enjoy the beautiful colors across the sky when the sun sets?

God is asking us to be content in ALL things, in any and every situation. God wants to be our enjoyment in and through every situation. Not just when we have the whole day off, or we get a spa certificate. We need to sense Him, in and through our EVERY DAY, No matter how stressful it may be.

“I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty, I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I CAN DO EVERYTHING THROUGH CHRIST WHO GIVES ME STRENGTH.” – Philippians 4: 12-13.

I used to think contentment was a bad word. I used to think that if I settled for contentment, it would keep me away from doing my best. However, all it proved to do was exhaust me and keep me from experiencing enjoyment all around me. I must cling to the truth of God’s word and what it tells me about contentment, and find enjoyment through it!

Romans 14:17, “For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.”

Righteousness, peace, and joy! These can be mine, and these can be yours, no matter what our circumstances.

So, lift that cappuccino up and enjoy it. Take that walk in those lush green parks. When you walk or run, feel your heartbeat in your chest. Talk with a friend, laugh heartily at a good joke, and let the joy of children put a smile on your face! God smiles when you do, and He wants you to enjoy your blessings.

TRUTH BOMB:

God smiles when we enjoy what He’s given us.

Find true enjoyment in something this week and thank God for it!

Next week, get ready for the topic of,  contentment.

Looking forward to talking with you then.

Speak Truth Love

In this final post on my “Love Series”, I want to speak about one of the most powerful ways we LOVE, through our words.

“Sticks and Stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me!”

This is not the truth! This is a blog about speaking Gods Truth in Love, so let’s get honest. Words hurt, they hurt badly! Sometimes so deeply, that the scars that are left remain with us forever. Long after a cut, a scrape, a bruise, or even a broken bone has healed. HONESTLY, words can leave such deep wounds that sometimes they remain open! They can even ooze at times, causing that insecurity that we live with to rise to the surface once again. They can cripple us in fear, or even paralyze us. Sometimes a scab forms but then we hear it again, that word, maybe in the form of an accusation, or maybe unintentional by the one who spoke it. We are faced with the situation and the insecurity rises in us so greatly that the scab is pulled off and it causes us to bleed again.

That very untrue phrase is often said by kids trying to deflect the silly words thrown at them as they encounter their first socialization experiences. Do you remember some of the hurtful things you heard or said?

“You can be my friend if you pick me first.”

“I like you, I’ll invite you to my birthday party.”

“You’re not my friend anymore!”

“Poo Poo head”

It often starts out so innocent. After all, “they’re just kids.” However, it only escalates from there. It’s grade school, or middle school, and you start hearing, “You can’t be on my team, you’re not any good.”

“That dress is ugly.”

“Is that all the money your family has, that’s what they buy you?”

” You’re fat!”

“You’re ugly!”

“That’s the grade you got on that test?”

“You’ll never be good enough.”

…the list goes on and on.

In fact, you can fill in your own blanks. No matter where we were raised, no matter how affluent or non-affluent our family was, we all heard words. Words that hurt, words that have stayed with us.

I remember the words spoken to me in fifth grade like it was yesterday. I was the oldest of four girls. My baby sister was born that year. My other two younger sisters were small, in fact you could say tiny. I was taller, I was bigger, and even though my first sister was only 11 months younger than me, she looked 3 to 4 years younger than me. She never fit into my hand-me-downs until 2 to 3 years later! That year, some of the boys in school started calling me “Pig.” As I write the words my hand shakes. I still hate writing it, because somehow admitting it seems to bring up fear that it may be true. I have always struggled with feeling that I am too big. I wasn’t back then! I look at pictures of my skinny legs, and I am still surprised that that is me. It is not how I saw myself. Those words hurt, they wounded me deeply, and they made a mark on my life that I have fought continuously. My family never made me feel like that. My mom told me I was beautiful, my dad told me I was beautiful, my sisters never teased me or made me feel big, but those words sunk in deep! They caused a wound, and they are a scar I still carry with me.

Now, we’re all grown up. We’re past all that right? Or are we? We certainly have learned to be a lot more careful about what we say, how we say it and where we say it. In fact as adults we disguise it much of the time in humor, or sweep it away with the comment, “just kidding.”

Well, let me tell you something, to this “Words of Affirmation” girl, “I am just kidding,” doesn’t take away the sting of the words spoken. In fact, sometimes it makes me feel like that person does not care about what they just said, and certainly not about the way it affected me.

Our words are so powerful and an incredible tool. With them we can build up, or tear down. Weather or not your love language is “words of affirmation,” words still affect all of us. Don’t take it from me, listen to what God has to say about our tongue.

Throughout the book of James, God tells us that the tongue is small but powerful, and needs to be tamed. James devotes the major part of an entire chapter to the tongue!

James 3:5, “Likewise, the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark.”

“It only takes a spark to get a fire going…” is one of my all-time favorite camp songs. However, living in Southern California long enough, with the dry weather and a little amount of rain, I have encountered a scary season, ” fire season!” It is a fact of life in Southern California. I have driven through smoke clouds with ashes falling on my windshield to the point of having to use my windshield wipers. I have watched the news closely to see how close the fire is coming to where we live. Praise God it is never threatened our home, but it has threatened the homes and cabins of many people we know and love. Not once have I heard a news reporter share that the fire was started with anything great or big. No, it was started by a single match, the embers left over from a campfire, a careless cigarette thrown out of a car window and so forth.

A tiny spark set hundreds of acres a blaze causing millions of dollars in damage, hundreds of homes lost, families displaced and even killed.

This is the image that James likens our tongue to! At the time James is writing this to us, there are no well trained fireman, with water hoses, chemicals to pour onto the fire, and planes to drop chemicals on top of the fire! No, in his day, a fire usually destroyed everything in its path. Much of the time it was left to run its course. They were simply unable to put it out until it burned itself out. No wonder James tells us to tame our tongue! He goes on to say that with it we have the power to “bless or curse!” My paraphrase….”to build up or tear down!”

James 3:9-10, “With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, (My Sisters), this should not be so.”

Words are powerful my friends. They are  WONDERFUL when spoken in love! They bring sunshine to a cloudy day, they put smiles on faces, they make us feel beautiful, worthy, and loved. They can give us wings to soar, to step out of our comfort zone, and take chances we never would take on our own without them. I wouldn’t be writing this blog without the written and spoken words of encouragement, love, belief, and support spoken to me by my loved ones! I keep every card given to me, because they hold inside of them the words from those who love me. On difficult days I read them and I am reminded that someone loves me and believes in me. I read them on good days too, and I am inspired to keep on keeping on!

As much as those cards and words mean to me from my loved ones, they pale in comparison to the love letter my God has written to me! He wrote it to you too! He tells me I am the apple of his eye. He tells me I am fearfully and wonderfully made. He tells me that he loved me so much, that I matter to him so much, that He sent his son to die for me. Let these Truths sink in deep, let them touch your heart. Those are the words I choose to hang onto. Those are the words I choose to believe. Those are the words I choose to live by, because those are the words of Truth!

TRUTH BOMB:

Your tongue can be used to bless or to curse, with every word you speak, you choose one or the other.

We have a powerful tool in our tongue! With it we have the power to encourage and build others up, or hurt and tear others down. Let’s commit to taming our tongue, to allowing God to use us to speak words of love, support, and encouragement to others. Let’s ask Him to help us keep our mouths shut before we stick our feet in them and cause hurt or damage to another.

If we can set an entire forest on fire with this tongue of ours, just imagine the good we can do with it!

God calls us to tame it. He gave it to us for a reason-to share his great love with others! Do others know Him by the words you say? Do others know Him by the words I say? I desperately want them to!

“Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.”- Proverbs 12:18!

Next week, get ready to ENJOY! God loves it when we do!

Speak Truth Love